We all strive for balance. Sounds simple - ISN'T. After all, what IS balance? We each have our own interpretation of what a balanced life is, and maybe our interpretations aren't actually accurate, but recitations of what we think it SHOULD be based on what we read or have seen on TV.
Same goes for HAPPINESS - what is it exactly? A good mood? A feeling of contentment based on life conditions, environment, the way people treat us, how much financial security we think we have? How happy are you AFTER your vacation?
Does living a balanced, happy life mean we can count our blessings despite challenges, and be returned to a state of joyous-all-is-well state of mind after a brief upset from some event?
Personally, I have always counted my blessings, and basically it was because I wanted to teach it to my daughters when raising them. As a single mom, there were emotional & financial challenges constantly, and to be a positive influence, I had to live what I wanted to teach. Example by living is more powerful and influential than mere words to a child. Children don't learn by hearing, they learn by observing. Sounds easy - ISN'T if you're trying to be consistent.
The girls are grown w/families of their own. Ironically, I am having issues in living my life as I have lived and taught my daughters when I was younger. I find myself in more bad moods and of bitter mind than I want for myself. I do count my blessings, I have a gratitude journal that I write at least 5 things I am grateful for each morning before I start my day. (Honestly, I don't do this every SINGLE day, but my days go better when I DO write in this journal)
This always worked in setting my day to start out in a feeling of gratitude for life's blessings, (even if one particular morning the only thing I can think of in the moment to be grateful for is the aroma of my morning coffee) inviting more blessings into my life. Now I write it with the taste of a bitter pill in my psyche. There is an issue in my life OUTSIDE myself that is effecting my lightness of spirit currently. It's a big heart-issue and it's kicking my ass despite daily applications of spiritual teachings. The goal of truth seeking and spiritual teachings of all kinds is to hold onto one's natural state of joyous mind despite life's exterior events that challenge this. Well, easier said than done. I have been practicing this for years, and something is missing to be making this work with this particular issue.
This whole process, is called WHERE I'M AT RIGHT NOW. I must accept this, embrace my state of mind and my grief process, however bitter, experience it, and then it will dissolve of its own accord with all the above applied to it. Conscious Observer. To be a conscious observer of our reactions to life's ass kickers of all sorts, will alleviate us being reactors. WATCH the bad mood come over you, WATCH what your mind does with a negative (or positive) outside influence. How long will the mind dwell on this that makes the observer upset? Observing it removes some of the 'taking it personal' nature of any event, however personal it seems at the time. I'm working this one hard & fast, and my ass is STILL getting kicked. It must be a very significant passage of personal growth that this issue is presenting. I intend to keep working with it and not give in to the sadness, helplessness and myriad other emotions that are evoked with this issue.
I've been trekking life on the spiritual path as long as I can remember. Affiliated with no church or organization saying their way is the only way, intuition, nature and books are my teachers. Silence is one of the best teachers, no TV or musical distractions. The sound of the forest (nature) is the music I listen to all the time. It assists the human spirit to feel like it's a part of nature, not separate from it, and it's the sense of separation that is the essence of any suffering we endure. Separation from the power we have to create change in our lives, power to help ourselves put life's issues into perspective, separation from the power we have been given to choose to go plant a flower rather than dwell in a bitter mindset.
There is a lady that I've met through a network that has inspired me to steer this blog into being geared to address life issues and create a place for those in difficult states of mind with the grief process to communicate. She and I have communicated and it is for her that I begin this new direction in my blog. Thank you "L" - you are a fragrant rose in the garden of life, and despite the overgrowth of weeds, your beauty stands out. She told me she would like to learn from me about a certain subject we came together over. She inspired me, and lifted my flagging spirit this sunny day, and now I write this blog straight from my heart in this moment.
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